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What is your true purpose in life? What do women really want? What makes a good lover? If you're a man reading this, you've undoubtedly asked yourself these questions - but you may not have had much luck answering them. Until now. In The Way of the Superior Man David Deida explores the most important issues in men's lives - from career and family to women and intimacy to love and spirituality - to offer a practical guidebook for living a masculine life of integrity, authenticity, and freedom. Join this bestselling author and internationally renowned expert on sexual spirituality for straightforward advice, empowering skills, body practices, and more to help you realize a life of fulfillment, immediately and without compromise.

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Customer Reviews:

• Embrace your masculine power
  "This book is a guide for a specific kind of newly evolving man. This man is unabashedly masculine--he is purposeful, confident, and directed, living his chosen way of life with deep integrity and humor--and he is sensitive, spontaneous, and spiritually alive, with a heart-commitment to discovering and living his deepest truth." ~ David Deida from "The way of the Superior Man"
  
  This is a powerful book. If you're conservative, it's going to push your edges and might be too much for you. However, if you're a man who's committed to living his life at his edge, understanding the ideas of masculine and feminine energy and how they play out in intimate sexual relationships, then this book is pretty much a must-read.
  
  In my experience, you may not always agree with everything Deida says, but you can be assured your perspective will expand--getting you one step closer to living your own highest truth. ...more info
• Great useful tool for Men
  A Great book filled with truths about the two sexes. Very useful for understanding the principles of polarity that keep the relationship healthy and vitalized between a man and a woman. Very helpful for men who are seeking to improve their relationships with women or get started on one....more info
• Dominance and submission reframed, yet again
  This book reads like a sociopath's rational for their abuse of others.
  Very creepy....more info
• Inner Game
  This isn't a book about how to meet women or build attract, per se, but for any guy who's interested in learning more about himself and about how women think, this is a good addition to your "pick up" library. Way of the Superior Man is focused on getting you to really examine how you think and treat woman and how your conventional wisdom about what women want and need are sometimes completely wrong.
  
  I've ready this book twice now and many of the major points reminded me of a more recent book titled Secrets of the A Game: How to Meet and Attract Women Anywhere, Anyplace, Anytime, which doesn't go nearly as in-depth as Mr. Deida's book, but instead devotes more to apply these same insights to meeting and attracting women.
  
  I like both books, but I highly recommend Way of the Superior Man because it's so much more important to learn these concepts before you can make much progress with other pick-up material....more info
• Davis Deida is amazing.
  I came across this book through a Tony Robbins seminar that I attended. It clearly describes how important it is for a man to stay in his masculine and a woman to remain in her feminine. This is something that we have sadly lost her in America. Great read!...more info
• A man has to act like one!
  Being a man and being a woman are things dictated to us by our bodies, basically by our sexualities. So superior man is the one who inherits his genes from the most basic form of male gene. That is why he is superior, and this book basically makes that point plenty clear. That is all. ...more info
• Honor the Poles, then Flip if You Want
  For me, the measure of a book like this is: Does it resonate with my life experience, then take me to valuable new or forgotten insights that feel like they "fit"? Deida's book does a 5-star job of this, and it is written in a particularly clear and accessible style.
  
  Reading a book like this is almost like reading a poem. Those who look for scientific validation or an argued sociological position will be disappointed. Your reaction to the book will also be personal. You probably won't like this book if you think masculine/feminine polarity has no place in a loving relationship.
  
  My recommendation for getting into the book is to look at the table of contents, pick a chapter that looks interesting, and read that chapter. I did this, and when I finally got to it, the Introduction seemed less powerful and direct than the rest.
  
  I particularly liked Deida's recognition that each of us has a complex nature. The masculine and feminine energy poles exist in each of us. His framework doesn't tie us down as individuals; rather he suggests that particular situations go better when we honor our pole and its opposite in our partner, rather than each striving for neutral....more info
• Worth reading... But not a masterpiece.
  The problem with this book is that it is written in a very vague manner. Many of the concepts are not clearly explained. I felt like I understood what he was saying, but in the end it turned out to be just a feeling. Another problem is that the book is heavy with spiritual mumbo-jumbo... If you can get past those two problems, the book is definitely worth reading. It has some good concepts to share, interesting frames of refference, and ought to influence you positively (assuming you dont read into it too much.) ...more info
• It's ok....
  I kind of bought this book on a whim, and its an ok book...nothing to new though, and once the author started using foul language it just kind of put a bad taste in my mouth...
  
  Conversations With God books 1, 2, & 3 are waaaaaaay cooler than this book that really anyone could have written......more info
• Great!
  Fantastic work. Definitely understands his subject deeply. I've read many books on this type of subject and each has snippets of wisdom, but this one puts a lot of the gems together. Really a must-have if you want to understand these strange creatures they call women....more info
• I am inspired to apply the concepts
  When reading books like this one, I have a tendancy to "protect" myself by absorbing the information in an intellectual way...additional data to add to my information buckets but not necessarily something to commit to with emotional enthusiasm. I've changed that with this book.
  
  The chapters are short and get to the point almost immediately. The chapters express spiritual, metaphysical, emotional and philosophical concepts in a functional manner consistent with how many men comprehend and apply new information.
  
  The "male" essence is explained not only from the perspective of applying it in your life, but also from the perspective of how it impacts the "female" essence in a partner. A perfect way of getting to see both sides of the coin. In fact, if you're a man with more "female" essence than "male", or almost any woman, you'll still get a lot of good information from this book.
  
  Overall, I like the way it teaches how the "male" essence can be "dominant" without being "domineering".
  
  I'm only half-way through the book and am already applying some of the information to my life. I feel better and stronger already simply by trying. Excellent stuff....more info
• NOT about stereotypes -- it's for people who seek passion
  David Deida is well known and admired and his work is deep and interesting. I just wanted to respond to some of the reviews here by people who view David's view of romance as being a shallow throwback to the 50's, with a jerk of a guy and a submissive woman. That ain't it. Those people apparently didn't read the introduction. "It doesn't matter if both partners are men or women. It doesn't matter if the man plays the feminine pole or ... if you change every day who plays the masculine pole... you need an energetic polarity... You don't need this difference for love, but you do need it for ongoing sexual passion. For some people who have a more balanced sexual essence, polarity doesn't matter... they would rather have a civilized friendship full of love and human sharing without the passionate ups and downs. For these people, this book will be irrelevant, possibly even offensive. This book is written specifically for people who have a more masculine sexual essence, and their lovers, who will have a more feminine sexual essence."
  Other reviews will give you more insights, but I just wanted to specifically call out and give my viewpoint to counteract this criticism of this book. ...more info
• A must read for Men and Women.
  The Way of the Superior Man is more of a recipe book or a guidebook for living life artfully, than an academic review of already existing literature.
  
  Written for people who have witnessed and/or lived the 50's style patriarchy or the modern day equality and political correctness and are ready to move beyond those.
  
  What Deida presents is a possible step for people who want to move from the loving, yet neutral equality already achieved in their relationship to a deeper passion. (Deeper passion not only in intimate relationships, but in life itself.)
  
  This book offers ways to do so without moving backwards into old sexual roles and stereotypes.
  Instead of "one size fits all" how-to's Deida offers inspiration to uncover your individual gifts and use them for the sake of love in both relationship and offered as a gift to the world.
  
  This applies to the masculine aspect in both men and women.
  It also offers a profound understanding of the "dance" between masculine and feminine and how this applies to relationships.
  
  One of the most common misperceptions leading to the misunderstanding that Deida's work supports old gender stereotypes is the belief that in order to be "feminine" a woman has to give up her "direction" in the world and workforce, while the man has to be in"control".
  In this book it becomes clear that this is in fact not so-it is simply useful for one partner in the relationship (man or woman) to take on the masculine and for the other partner to take on the feminine when passion and the sparks of polarity are desired.
  
  This is done as a practice-an artform- constantly fresh and in always new and surprising ways.
  
  The way of the Superior Man is inspiring not only in the practical realms of women, money and sex, but also in the realms of spiritual developement....more info
• Enlightening
  Deida conveys a pure and sensical reflection on the taciturn desires of both men and women. His methodology is truly revelational. His message is centered around the symbiotic relationship of the masculine and feminine essence, which is not obligatorily related to secondary sexual characteristics. The didactic comes when we appreciate the differences amongst ourselves and begin to grow away from the antiquated PC roles that have spawned abusive feminism (not to be confused with feminism as a whole or women's suffrage) and the correlary emasculation. Understanding our differences is critical to helping each other with the most vivacity....more info
• Confirms my suspicions
  This was an excellent book. After the recent failure of my 23 year marriage - it helped me to understand my part in the failure. That will help me heal and be more forgiving as well. Many of the key concepts I had suspected, and had been experimenting with in my interactions with women. I recommend this book for everyone, male, female, straight or gay....more info
• Alvin's lifecoachesblog.com review
  I know I've just read a good book when 1) I want my friends to read it 2) I want to re-read it again after I finish. The Way Of The Superior Man does both.
  
  David Deida makes it clear at the beginning of his book that even though the book title is The Way Of The Superior Man, this book is for the masculine aspect of a person, whether it be male or female.
  
  I love it when a book opens my eyes to new horizons, helps shed insight on the mistakes I've made and the new directions I can take going forward. The Way Of The Superior Man showed me the differences between the masculine and feminine in a non-apologetic and revealing way. I had a lot of `oh, so that's what I did wrong in my past relationships' moments, and took home more than a few ideas...that actually worked when I tested them out.
  
  The book is divided into mini-chapters, with one main idea per chapter. One of my favorites is chapter 47, `Take into Account the Primary Asymmetry':
  
  "Although you and your woman are equal beings, you are very different creatures. If she has a feminine sexual essence, her core will be fulfilled when love is flowing. For example, she can experience difficulties in her career, but if full love is flowing in her life - with her children, friends, and with you - then her core will be fulfilled.
  
  Not so for you. If you have a masculine essence, then your woman and children can be loving you all day and night, but if your career or mission is obstructed, you will not feel at ease. You won't even want to share much intimate time with your woman until you have your career or mission back on track.
  
  Your woman's core is fulfilled by love. Your core is released from stress by aligning your life with your mission."
  
  Buy this book if you want to better understand the masculine force, how it's constrained by the popular beliefs of society and how you can exude stronger masculine energy.
  
  Buy this book also if you want to get a firmer grasp of the differences between the sexes and how you can use that to better improve your life and your relationships. But be warned, David tells it like he sees it, and like them or not, some of his ideas will challenge you....more info
• The Way Of The OK Book
  This book is called a "spiritual guide" for men,but,as Mike Meyers Coffee Talk character would say,its neither spiritual nor a guide! This is not a "course of study" to somehow become a better man,or a happier one. Its a short book of pithy commentaries on men and their lives. It isnt "spiritual" as it deals with very everyday things like sex,love,career and self-esteem. The author has spent many years studying eastern philosophies,apparently,and like many sophisticated practicioners,seems a bit,uhm,arrogant. He makes these grand declarations about what you should do,whether doing tantric breathing,or getting a life mission. Basically he is saying,"Change! Completely! Now!" when change is slow and far from certain.WE cant spend 10 years with a Master of esoteric arts. This book will NOT change your life,but it will entertain you,and maybe cause you to think about love and sex in a bit of a new light! I came across this while looking at PUA stuff,and this is kind of in that vein. If you are trying to do long range changes to be a better and more succesful guy,especially with the opposite sex,this book makes an interesting addition. So...its OK! Worth the price? Yes. ...more info
• Your interpretation will come from your personal consciousness
  Yes, some people find his direct use of certain words & phrases offensive (potentially to woman holding a certain point of view)...
  
  However, if your heart & mindset while reading come from a place of LOVE, then you will realize David shares from a purer source regarding the "ying & yang" within such. When you come from a place of love and understanding, the principles within this book resonate a connection to the masculine's deepest source - without any negative connotations of control or misuse. If you come from a stagnant diagnostic standpoint, or from a consciousness of reckless advancement, then this book will manifest completely different results and opinion.
  
  To truly love, from your depth while upon your purpose, is what makes a man. The "wimp", a stereotype so many people in the reviews have complained about, has become the majority of the males in our society.. those boys giving into to social constraints and material wants without truly living from their deepest passion & purpose in this life.
  
  In terms of masculine & feminine energy, we have no question become de-polarized as a society! You can see it all around us. The question isn't about what roles or careers we choose as men & women, but how we live them out - amongst social rules or expectations, with our lovers, friends, family, all the while cautiously strapped to the fears & walls we create within. There is so much research on this topic resulting from studies in demographics, divorce rates, the history of social & political seasons, men becoming more metro, women becoming overly independent & closed off, etc, that those who say David isn't founded are only correct in the point that he doesn't list enough references and credentials. (BTW, credentials are B.S.! Give me someone with credentials you find impressive, and I'll show you 10 write ups of people with half the education or experience with even more rock solid bios or "achievements")
  
  MOST IMPORTANTLY-
  This book is not about one sex being more superior or stronger than the other, yet instead a guide for men (or those individuals with a masculine core) to reopen their deepest power and resonate in all of their glory. IN TURN, through love, purpose, passion and understanding of these principles, his loving feminine partner will also be able to truly open her deepest core as she will no longer require to make up for the lack in her life.
  
  My beautiful, spontaneous, ever flowing, and ever open girlfriend & I have BOTH read this book. Our relationship and lives will never be the same! We now communicate and hold each other in more respect while upholding the depth of our deepest desires... it has launched us through the stratosphere in passion, understanding, and love for each other and ourselves.
  
  For those who ask "superior to what?.. the thought of being superior is offensive"... I SAY BE SUPERIOR TO YOURSELF! A superior man challenges himself and doesn't worry about what the rest think, do, or compare....more info
• This book blows
  At the risk of sounding like a bored, angry teenager who spends too much time on the internet: I really thought this book blew. I didn't read much of it (Why would I take the time to read a book I didn't like). But what I did read was stupid and cheesy. I'm embarrassed to even have this book in my home....more info
• This book will turn a man into a whipped sissy
  The title of this book first caught my eye. However, once I read this book, I found out that "The Way of the Superior Man" is nothing more than a man giving other men terribly wrong advice on how to behave toward the opposite gender.
  
  David tells men to be kind, loving, supportive, gentle, and caring toward women. He believes men should cater to a woman's every need and always be there for them. That's fine and dandy in an alternate world but here in the 21st century United States, those nice guy tactics will either get a man nowhere or lead him to a broken heart.
  
  Basically, David is telling men to play the "nice guy" role. The terrible truth is if you follow this book's advice and compliment women, then the women will think along the lines of "Wow if he thinks I'm hot, imagine the hotter guys I can attract." This is mainly a problem in the western world. Nice guys are seen as the losers and jerks the winners. David wants men to continue to be meek losers.
  
  It is very ironic that women want to be dominated in a relationship yet they complain that men don't respect them. Women truly are their own worst enemies.
  
  If this book is helpful to anyone at all, it will be to men who are middle-aged or older. This is because women only want nice guys after the women themselves are past their prime. When women are no longer hot and have been around the block more times than the Good Humor man, then they go after the nice guy. Then they suddenly want respect after living the life of a morally bankrupt, high-maintenance, gold-digging tramp.
  
  It is sad to admit the fact that most women, especially American women, possess a ridiculous sense of entitlement. Yet, besides their bodies, these shallow women have nothing else to offer anyone. Most young women today do not even know how to cook a meal, clean a room in a house, or do laundry. They are merely gold-digging psychotics.
  
  Unfortunately, the only way for a man to succeed in modern relationships in the United States is to jettison all of the advice given in this book.
  
  A man must then become "a player" because the player game is the complete opposite of being a nice guy. Yet all its tactics of being glib, superficial and saying whatever a woman wants to hear to get her to date him absolutely WORKS. Being a nice guy who gives and has his kindness reciprocated by a woman is how things should be but women only get turned on if you play a lying, manipulative trash-talking snake character with them.
  
  Though not all women are like this, for the VAST majority, this is so true and it's almost nauseating.
  
  The minority of American women who are attracted to nice guys, have good personalities, and are half-way intelligent or talented are ugly women. And this is because they have to make up for how unattractive they are. If a girl in a bar asks you to buy her a drink, get her a glass of water.
  
  
  
  ...more info
• Love it
  I have never felt more understood by a man than by David Deida. My husband is reading this book right now and he loves it as well. Very short chapters, very concise. Funny to be referred to as "your woman"...more info
• Wow
  Wow...In an age where men are encouraged to immasculate themselves by adopting feminine traits and where women view the feminist movement as an obligation to become more manly, this book is a heart-felt and well-thought out overview of what it means to be masculine and how masculinity and femininity compare and contrast. It also is surprisingly spiritual in it's approach to everything: women, life purpose, sex, etc. I find myself looking at the world in different ways and that when approaching everything in the manner suggested in the book I feel a certain rightness, as if I'm finally fitting the triangle into the triangle hole.
  
  As a young man raised by his mother I was astonished to discover how deeply I identified with the ideas put forth in this book, at my core. I realize I had fallen into the same trap that many men of my generation have: that women want men who are polite and don't push, that boldness goes unrewarded, that tenacity is irritating and henceforth undesirable.
  
  One of the things that the book does best is explain woman and her feminine core simply, thoroughly, and most importantly: relate-ably to men. Early in my life I was under the impression that, because men and women are social equals, we are the same. In the last few years of my life, which was the beginning of my sex life, I realized that this is completely and unequivocally untrue, and while I would occasionally obtain tidbits of insight into female psyche, I was left, more than less, in the dark. This book, however, gives a clear and concise explanation of how the feminine polarity operates. Do not take this to mean that you'll be able to understand women, in actuality this book makes it clear that women are unable to be understood on a logical level, which is the level on which men operate.
  
  Suffice it to say that this book was read with eyes wide open and eyebrows shot up from start to finish. More than any other book I have ever read, this book not only opened up parts of me to myself that I had heretofore brushed off as flighty, fantastical, wrong, or simply ignored, but it had me understand, come to terms with, and accept them as fundamental pieces of who I am as a being. It is a very special piece of literature that is able to do that, especially in such clear in simple language, and one of which I have not seen equaled....more info
• Way
  I liked the book overall. Some great insights. Changed the way I think about masculinity and femaninity. But can get repetitive and is not based on any actual research. ...more info
• Read This Book
  This book is written with a depth of insight and wisdom that come from obvious experiential knowledge by the author. Deida has filled a gap in literature with this book. It is a one of a kind, cutting edge book.
  
  As someone who has thought for a long time that I have not lived up to my own masculinity and didn't know where to turn for advice, this book was a wonderful inspiration to become more of a "man". Deida's idea of a man isn't the macho tough guy, nor the soft spoken nice guy who seeks approval. His idea of a man is someone who knows their purpose and pursues it with passion. It is someone who doesn't seek outside validation. He understands his woman and her moods and can stay strong and stable during them, rather than acting defensively. It is someone who is unshakable in his loving, and with his openness, passes his woman's and the world's tests.
  
  This book truly gave me inspiration and insight to move beyond many of my "mama's boy" habits and become a more confident, self-validating man. And because of this it has made an enormous amount of difference in the quality my current relationship and the amount of attraction in it.
  
  Thank you David Deida.
  Read this book....more info
• Outstanding and very frank
  Very frank, very practical very easy to read. Wish that I had read it at 18!...more info